Friday, 3 April 2020

Lauren Gottlieb divulges secrets about her battle with depression

BOLLYWOOD: Lauren Gottlieb has been away from Bollywood for a really long time. The pretty dancer cum actress has been keeping a happy face on social media and treating her fans to dance videos and her travel pictures. However, all that is far from the truth. Lauren spoke to Mumbai Mirror and revealed the horrid tales of her personal life. From depression to her absence from films, she has spoken up about everything.

“On the social media I continued to present a happy-go-lucky face, but deep down, I was sad and unhappy, seeking solace in alcohol, prescription drugs or anything that could make me happy. I was stuck deep down a hole, feeling like a victim and desperately waiting for someone to pull me out. It took me a long time to realise that everything was happening for me and not to me,” confided the 31-year-old actress to Mumbai Mirror.

 

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Today was A DAY!!! Actually it was more like 3 days. A Threefer!!! Got a good butt kicking. My favorite kind too. One full of hard work, long hours, dedication, passion, resilience…I could go on and on but I’m falling asleep mid sentence (see my stories). . . I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m so happy to be back in India! My heart feels full. Not as full as my inbox tho! Thank you all so much for the greetings!! I feel like I’m back with my big ole happy Indian family! I have lots of projects coming up. Things that are maybe different from what you are used to seeing of me. Some will feel familiar. This is the start of Lauren Version 2.0. Lauren V2, coming at YOU! And I’m so excited to take you on this journey with me 🕊🦋💓💋 . . #foreignkilauren #backinthebay #bombay #india #aka #mumbai #day1 #succsss #HERODAYS #LaurenV2 #comingatyou

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So what did it take for her be back on her feet? Books, podcasts, and a lot of meditation helped Lauren finally get back in touch with her inner true self. The process took almost 2 years.

 

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Talking about her tough times, the actress said, “I was up for a lead role in Step Up 4 and lost it to one of my close friends. I was so devastated I couldn’t even bring myself to wish her. I realised my ego was coming in the way and it took me five hours to get over it. As soon as I sent her a congratulatory message, I got an email from the makers of ABCD.

 

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. This is how I feel 💓♥️💓 when I think of you! 😍 . . . #photography #firstclass #style

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However, after the immense success, things started to get worse for her. “I fell into the trap of fame and fortune, I got greedy. I never spoke about my feelings, but they were visible on my face. When people came to click my pictures, it felt like they were taking something away from me, while I would rather they come to talk to me. I would leave the house wearing a baseball cap and headphones, my eyes trained on the ground. It was terrifying! I used to cry all through the long flight from US. But the second I landed, I used to shut off my emotions. I felt so empty. I am honest, but I was constantly being lied to. Then, there was the weight of expectations. I was being touted as India’s best dancer and wasn’t allowed to fail,” she admits while speaking to Mumbai Mirror.

So why did we see so less of her in the sequel to ‘ABCD’? She opens up about how she was offered the lead role of Vinita aka Vinnie, but she chose to play Olive, the American-Indian dancer. After all, giving her background, she related to it more. However, “I was told by the director that I had messed up with my choice of role. I was told different stories by different people,” admitted Lauren.

 

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She was fragile, but not like a flower, like a bomb 💣💥

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Weekend Dance Break!!! Who remembers this dance jam?! 🎉😝💃🏻🌟💋🎶

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With all these happening, how are things now that she is back in India? “I was in a place where I had ticked off every goal, people from two countries loved me, yet I couldn’t give myself completely to any of my relationships.

 

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I was hankering for everyone’s approval without listening to myself,” she confided to Mumbai Mirror. And now, “I plan to travel across the country for the next three weeks, sharing my insights with the world. I meet strangers, listen to their stories and share their happiness. Through the act of giving, I have found self-love. I am ready to get back into the game and can’t wait to resume work,” said Lauren before signing off.

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